If I go to bed now, I can get an hour and a half of sleep before I have to get up for work…
Canada, we seem nice, but we’re hella into anal
last year i was eating in a fancy, large restaurant when i began to hear a rumble and the distant sound of people chanting ‘potassium, potassium’ and suddenly hundreds of people dressed as bananas flood this restaurant chanting potassium over and over and we were trapped there for a very long time because the bananas would not leave and they were everywhere
i wasn’t joking
the more sexual and inappropriate you are with me the better we’ll get along
i will never be mad at girls showing off their bodies on tumblr bc tbh if i was a hot girl on this site you wouldn’t even believe i owned clothes
So I was snuggling with my boyfriend earlier (I was being the big spoon) and he was getting sleepy.
I decided to move my hand and touch his butt because butts.
He proceeded in all his sleepy cuteness to reach over, grab my hand and pull it back in front of him and whisper “you’re gonna love me for my personality.”
I died laughing for about 15 minutes straight.